It has been all over the news last night that Tyron Perez (a contender of a reality show, Starstruck 1) is found dead in an abandoned car. It is believed that he committed suicide. I feel sad for him. I can feel his pain. I can see his face crying while he is deciding which fate he will choose. It also breaks my heart that a lot of people are judging him because of what he did to himself. I want to defend him. I want to scream at those people. I want to tell them “You don’t know a thing about him so please stop judging him and just let him rest in peace.” We don’t know each other personally but I feel sorry for him. I just hope that he is happy wherever he is now. I know he is in good hands. And I hope he will find true happiness there.
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After reading the news on twitter last night, I feel lifeless again. The number of suicide incidents are rising. Days after I first committed suicide, there are a lot of suicide news all over the country including the infamous gay couple in SM Pampanga. The gay shot his partner with a gun and then he shot himself after. They are both dead. Now, it is Tyron Perez, who is dead now. I keep on thinking why I am still on earth and they are not. Is it true that the reason I am here is because of God’s miracle? Maybe. Because I should be dead right now after what I did on my last suicide attempt. Maybe God is telling me that I haven’t fulfilled my purpose on earth.
I just hope that I’ll never hear a news about suicide again. I don’t wanna hear sad stories.
And I hope someday, I’ll learn the reason why God let me live the second time around. I want to know my..
Life’s purpose.
I am Ms. Brightside 
Bunso Anne, it is very sad that others around you are taking their life and you have made a conscious effort to keep going on. There are a lot of times when we take a stand to do the right thing, we see such utter chaos around us. That chaos can cause us to sway from the decisions to do the right thing.
You stay the course. They say it is darkest just before the dawn. Expect these dark times to appear as you are attempting to get help for yourself. It is a horrible thing that those people have left this world by their own hand, but your main focus right now is Anne! Not Tyron, not the kids down the street, no one but you! You are the priority! Concentrate on Anne getting better. You get better and you will be able to help so many.
That is my older brother voice!
Thank you Kuya Tom. I just feel sad about Tyron. I just wish that a helping hand had helped him before he took away his own life.
Believe me I understand. I am not trying to take away the pain his friends and family must be going through and you are human so you care. I only want you to know that concentrating to much on him can hinder any progress you have made for yourself. Just think positive about my bunso, Anne!
One of the reasons you are still here on Earth is to make my life a little more special by being a part of it!
Yes, I understand you. And I promise, I’ll continue to stay positive about my life.
I know what it is like to be in the depths of despair, wanting to just give up. I know how it feels to be locked in a cage, like you cannot escape your own self. But you are not alone. I believe its true you do have a purpose and the proof is you are still here, alive to tell us about your story. You matter and you are important. You are brave and you are a survivor. Thank you for sharing your story with us.
blessings, Joan
Thank you Joan for telling me I am not alone. And also for re-assuring me that I matter and I am important. Thank you.
Anne